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Words don’t come easy to me… (F.R. David)

As you grow up you learn new words, new phrases, new sentences. The most primal need to communicate, to share ideas and emotions with others, the ability to use words marks every developmental phase. And the more of these random squiggles and shapes, combined in the correct order you are able to learn, the more clearly and succinctly you are able to make yourself, your needs, your thoughts, opinions and ideas known.
But often, those words are not only the black and white squiggles on paper, that we are able to recognize and identify and pronounce. Often, those words are physical, tangible emotions. Raw, burning emotions, bubbling exciting emotions, represented by a combination of sounds. When words truly carry a power, when we truly understand a word, it is not due to the accessibility of a dictionary, but rather due to the vulnerability of a heart that has felt that word, rather than cognitively understood it. A heart that knows what the word means because it has experienced the word. The heart has to have experienced the full force and impact of the word before its truly understood. A word, known that way, holds the power, just a combination of vowel and consonant blends, holds the power to cause you to lash out, to giggle, to smile, smirk, boil, to alter and fluctuate in mood and temperature. Physical reactions to a  combination of sounds.

When you experience words in a way that a classroom, dictionary or thesaurus can never explain, that’s really learning. That is when you never forget,

Jealousy, lust, passion, love. We know the definitions, but for the lucky ones, we have experienced the definitions. In every cell in our body. We have allowed the word combinations to pulse through our veins, to wreck havoc with our blood pressure, with our ability to process information logically, to physically move us from one destination to another.

The lucky ones have lived words. Not just read them. Lucky still when the words have negative connotations, for what is life if lived only as a voyeur, as a journalist reporting on the visually observed, but never being part of the actual experience. What is life if the beat of the iambic pentameter can not be measured in blood?

You can intellectualize words and sympathize with the experience of the protagonist of the story, but you will never have known the word unless you have felt it. Unless the word itself has consumed you. And in consuming you, you become an altered state of what you were. For nothing is consumed and remains as it originally was.

Don’t be afraid of words. They are only markings on a page. But be afraid that that is all they will ever be to you. For it’s in the provocation of a reaction that the true power of language lies. When your stomach knots and your jaws clench and your mind narrows, when ONE word can make you feel so alive you want to burst. When one word can set you alight, when one word can produce a physical response that burns inside of you, for better or worse. Lust. Passion. Desire. Jealousy. Loss. Pain. When you come alive inside and every nerve ending tingles, and every sinew contracts, when that word explodes in your innermost core, when that word implodes on your heart, when that word explodes out of your mouth, your eyes, your sweat, when that word – that ONE word can alter the course of destiny, that is when you have lived. Made your mark. Invoked a destiny. For generations to come.

Passion.

The passion that drives sports teams to give every bit of their guts.

The passion that makes you pay a price you never deemed yourself able to pay, yet you do pay it, against all odds.

The passion that makes your knees go weak, your breathing erratic, your heart pound in your chest.

The passion that takes you late into the night and makes you wake up early in the morning.

The passion that drives you on beyond your limits.

The passion that asks for more when you have no more to give, yet you find a reserve deep within your soul.

That is a word that goes beyond the Oxford definition of “strong emotion” or “strong enthusiasm”.

Its a sensation that washes over you and changes destinies. Changes histories.

You let it fill your entire soul, you let it drench your soul, you let it flood your mind, you let yourself drown in that word.

In a tribute to my friend who said: ” There is no end to the Passion in all I do, or even say. My words will touch you when you hear my voice, my actions will move you; and your body and mind will be locked in a tantric blissful state. Unable to look away as our eyes lock, as I explain things to you. So much passion. So much Desire. A divine energy that connects you to all of me. That is my passion. All that is around us. Life.

Words must never be just words. Give in and give consent so that they can fill you. Understand them from all perspectives. Let them in and get to know them. Experience it for yourself . Define it your way. Provoke the emotion in yourself – or be – dare I say – curious enough to provoke it in others.”

That my friend, at the end of the day, is proper connection, a connection that defies words. Intellect. Time.

Words.

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